Hunger by Donna Jo Napoli

Author:Donna Jo Napoli [Napoli, Donna Jo]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster/Paula Wiseman Books
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Part 4

A Cold Start to 1847

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Plans

It was black in the cottage, like on the night between Christmas Eve and Christmas morn. And I was sitting up again, awakened by a nightmare again. Da rolled from his back to his side to his back to the other side. He moaned in his sleep. Ma let out thin cries now and then. Only little Paddy slept soundly. That’s how it had been ever since we’d burned the fever hut. That was two weeks ago. Sleep was just an invitation to fear. And it had gotten worse since the day after New Year’s, when Uncle Odran had left. No one wanted him to return to Dublin. It felt like he was going off to sure doom.

He said he hoped he wasn’t leaving behind sure doom. And he gave Da his shoes, saying they might help fend off the devils. Thick-soled shoes.

I had the awful feeling that nightmares would be the rule in our cottage for a long time to come. But I’d had enough of them. It was time to stand and fight.

I had no idea what the hour was, but I didn’t see any point in staying on this sleeping mat wondering. Besides, I had decided to go meet Miss Susanna again, and I was eager to do it—just climb that hill and tramp on over to her little wooded hiding place—and confront her. Because that’s what I was going to do. Uncle Odran had gone all the way to England and tried to make the people there listen to him—he’d tried and failed. But I wouldn’t fail. Miss Susanna was lonely, and even bickering with your enemy is less painful than loneliness. Granny had said that. So Miss Susanna would listen. She’d asked me twice, “Whose fault was that?” Now I had the answer. That would be the start. I was cunning, like Da said. I’d convince her.

Miss Susanna had said to come early, when I first woke up.

When did she wake up?

But even if she woke late, it didn’t matter, because it would take me so long to get there.

I opened the door just the smallest amount and slipped outside. The wind stole my breath. I was so thick! An idiot, like Miss Susanna had said. I should have put on my old jumper. It was too late now. I didn’t want to risk waking Ma and Da.

And she’d told me to bring my doll, Margaret. I’d forgotten that, too. My head was empty.

Bo Bo lumbered over toward me. I looked around at the dreary but undeniable dawn. By the time I got back from seeing Miss Susanna, it could be nearly midday, and Bo Bo would be in pain. I’d milk her now, then.

Only the milking bucket was inside too.

There was no choice.

I went back inside.

Ma was sitting up on her sleeping mat. “Lorraine?” she whispered. “What are doing, up and about at this hour?”

It was cold inside, but still so much warmer than outside. I didn’t want to go out again.

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